I don't know what's wrong with me...I can't fall asleep. I feel tired, but my mind is going a million miles an hour!
I don't know why my mind is like this, and it's always before I go to sleep. hahaha. It's like I don't react or think about things completely during the day because I'm busy, or like to push it away, then when I'm still and calm, these things resurface. I feel as if I'm like the furthest thing from a perfectionist sometimes, then it seems I can't stop over analyzing things. Oh well--I think it begins with the fact that I need to come to terms with myself about certain things, but I just don't want to yet. I hate it when I find myself in a situation I can't control, or it's simply going the way I don't want it, and I feel like I need to act a certain way towards what is occuring because of these boundaries or rules I've created for myself that are probably stupid and even unattainable. I would like to chaulk it up to 'everything happens for a reason'. This to me is obvious, however finding the reason, or at least owning up to the reality of it is the general issue. I wonder when I became such a fearful person. Fearful of taking the next step, a leap of faith, a big change, or accepting a risk. Conclusion? I'M TOTALLY NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!
-Erin Glynn
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